Swear words and death threats

Okay, so this is to all of you who have been making fun of me for getting so worked up about Grey's Anatomy.
(ESPECIALLY THE IDIOT WHO TOLD ME "IT'S FICTION".)
WHOEVER YOU ARE: **** YOU.

I have been through ELEVEN SEASONS of this show. THAT'S 10 YEARS. 10 YEARS OF THE SAME CHARACTER WHO I HAVE GROWN TO LOVE AND CHERISH.
Many characters have been killed off over the years.
George, Mark, Lexie. Henry, Denny, Heather. HUNDREDS OF PATIENTS WHO I GREW VERY ATTACHED TO. SO MANY PEOPLE.

BUT DEREK?
DEREK IS THE MAN THE SHOW IS BUILT AROUND. I would rather them kill Meredith than Derek. I seriously would. AND IT WASN'T EVEN A GOOD DEATH. IT WAS HORRIBLY WRITTEN.
The deal from the beginning was that Meredith and Derek would end up together. That was the deal. Whatever was thrown our way, we would take it, because we had the promise of their eternal happiness.
AND THEN THIS HAPPENED.
My whole life is a lie.

SO DON'T TELL ME THAT IT'S JUST ******* FICTION.
I WILL KNIFE YOU.

OVER.

NOPE NOPE NOPE

EVERY SWEAR WORD I'VE EVER HEARD IN ANY LANGUAGE AS WELL AS ALL OF THE SWEAR WORDS I DON'T KNOW ARE RUNNING THROUGH MY HEAD AND ALSO OUT OF MY MOUTH.

DEREK SHEPHERD IS DEAD.

GREY'S ANATOMY.

DEREK IS DEAD.

11 SEASONS.

I HAVE BEEN BETRAYED.

I CAN'T EVEN ARTICULATE.

I FEEL LIKE I'M IN THE TWILIGHT ZONE AND I'M JUST DRIFTING ALONG AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO.

I CAN'T- I DON'T-

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

NOPE. NOPE NOPE NOPE.

OVER.

End of the semester whatever

Finals are in two weeks.

TWO WEEKS AHH.

I have 4 papers due in the next 10 days and I'm either working, in class, or working on them. Or sleeping.

So summer will be here shortly and I will be back to working full time (that's what I do in the summer) and I'll be even more boring than I am right now. 9-5 in an office. So very adult.

The sugar thing is still on track! I actually bought Jack a chocolate chip muffin a few days ago (because I bribe him with baked goods to do his math homework) and I ate some of it and didn't even like it. It was too sweet. Which is great! I'm detoxing to the point where I don't like it!

Oh! So a few days ago I made a decision. Well, about a week ago, really. It was a momentous occasion and I've slowly been informing all of my friends of my great plan and they've all been very supportive so far.

So here it is. My decision.

I'm going to start dressing like an adult.

*jazz hands*

Specifically, a mid to late 20's adult.

High heeled boots and blazers. You should see my Pinterest right now. It's insane.

I have a friend (Kendra) who is basically my personal shopper/stylist and we've discussed what this future fashion movement looks like for me and she's going to help me achieve it.

We'll build slowly (don't worry mom, I won't go crazy right away) and fill my wardrobe with only specifically chosen, pre-approve pieces. This last weekend black jeans were bought. Next on the list is a grey blazer.

So yes. There's my very anti-clamatic, life altering decision.

It's all about confidence! I'm now at a place in my life where I want to put forth the effort and I actually have the effort to put forth and I want to do this. For myself.

So I'm going to start building my mid to late 20's adult wardrobe and be awesome and make all of the other 'age appropriate'ly dressed college students super jealous.

(I wore a blazer all day yesterday. To classes and everything.)

Also I got my hair cut today. This was a very cosmetic based post. Also very boring. But you're the one who took the time to read it, so that's on you. No complaining.

Over.

College field trips are so fab

THE GREATEST MOMENT OF MY COLLEGE CAREER JUST HAPPENED.

Okay, so I had a field trip for art today. (College fields trips are totally fab by the way.) We had a school bus that picked us up and we went to a mural downtown and a big pioneer thing also downtown and then these big stone things in Elmwood park, etc. We were even on a school bus. It was very nostalgic and super awesome. If all of my classes had field trips it would make college so much better.

ANYWAY, the fun trip came after we were done and on our way back to campus. So the driver missed the 'right to go left' loop thing and without that we would have had to go all the way down dodge and turn off onto 72nd or something and he didn't want to do that. There's a little stop light between campus and 72nd where people often make U-turns to avoid 72nd.
Keep in mind we're in a SCHOOL BUS.
So he decides that we're going to U-turn. He's basically taking up two lanes in preparation to make a wide turn and people are honking as they go by and it's this huge mess, and THEN HE ACTUALLY TAKES THE U-TURN and people are still honking and he's basically halted traffic and he's yelling, "YEAH, YOU LIKE THAT?" And then because it's only 4 lanes he HAD TO BACK UP AND REALIGN and so he's yelling, "YOU'RE GONNA LIKE THIS EVEN MORE." And we're all in the back holding onto our seats and laughing so hard until he finally righted the bus and managed to get us back to campus and it was the greatest bus ride of my life and I have been on many bus rides.

over.

Backdated blog post

BACK-DATED BLOG POST: this happened like a month and a half ago but I'm going to write it as if it happened right now. Here we go.

I had my American Lit midterm today. I'VE BEEN FREAKING OUT ABOUT IT. When I told my friend Kendra at the beginning of the semester that I was taking a class with Guerra the first thing out of her mouth was, STUDY FOR HIS MIDTERMS. So obviously that was going to make things worse in my brain. It was an online midterm which led to the question of where would I take it? Not in the dorm, because I am very distractable. Not in the library for the same reason. So I decided on my parent's house.

HOWEVER WHEN I GOT THERE IT TURNED OUT MY HOUSE WAS AKIN TO A TUBERCULOSIS SANATORIUM. They were all walking zombies passed out on any flat surface, wrapped in blankets, etc. At one point I got up to put a bowl in the dishwasher and my mom yelled, "NO, STOP. QUIT TOUCHING THINGS. JUST FINISH AND LEAVE."
Thanks mom.

So on to the midterm itself:
 We had two hours. It was basically all essays. I actually ran out of time on the last one. IT WAS AWFUL. I took it, packed up, and left.

BECAUSE THIS IS BACKDATED YOU GET TO HEAR THE ENDING.

So I got both my midterm and my two papers back. You remember, the ones that I ripped out in one Sunday night and live blogged through?

I GOT AN A- ON THE AM. LIT. ONE (the one I was most concerned abut because I did it between the hours of 11pm and 2am and it's an English class which mean they grade a bit more harshly.)

I GOT A 50/50 ON THE WORLD CIV ONE. (he said I demonstrated 'a clear understand of the text'. I seriously had no idea what that thing was about. I skimmed the book that afternoon. It was the one with the words I didn't understand.)

AND AN A ON THE MIDTERM THAT I DIDN'T QUITE FINISH.

As soon as I saw the grades I called my mom and and was bouncing up and down on Kendra's couch as I told her about it.
So there you have it kids, procrastination does pay.

Over.

I feel so free

I still have some back dated things to post (THAT I'M WORKING ON WRITING) but I need to put in this brief interlude to let you guys know THAT I DROPPED MY STATS CLASS AND THIS IS THE HAPPIEST I HAVE BEEN IN SEVERAL WEEKS.

I called my mom, totally bawling, after taking 2 Xanax in an attempt to get through the freaking study guide for tomorrow's test and we both decided that my mental health is more important. I can suddenly breathe again. And everyone knows that once your mom says it's okay, it'r really okay and everything is so much better. Actually everything is just better after talking to your mom. It's just a fact of life. That, and snuggling a puppy, preferably your own.

So, thanks mom for being cool with it, and AHH I FEEL SO FREE. I immediately told all of my roommates about how happy I know am, still crying slightly and my face all red and they are all extremely excited for me.

So, a note for all of you kids out there. Mental health is more important and there are some really terrible teachers out there so watch out.

Also, love you mom.

Over.

The skittle challenge

Okay, so this happened like 3 weeks ago and I’m just now getting it written. Everything will be sort of back dated for a little while. I HAVE BEEN SO BUSY LATELY.

So on Saturday night (3 weeks ago) we were having dinner (Me, little brother, mom, dad, Allen-who-is-little-brother’s-friend, and Cady-who-is-my-friend-and-happens-to-be-Allen’s-little-sister).

We were discussing the disappearance of a certain 54oz. bag of skittles from our kitchen counter… 

Exhibit A

Little brother just shrugged and said, “It’s in my room.” Something happened next though I can’t remember what, but in the end it culminates to my father saying, “It’s not like the flavors mean anything. You can’t tell.” Cady immediately piped in, “I can tell.” quietly, as little brother huffed in indignation, announcing that he also could tell the difference. Thus, the challenge was born.

It was mom who suggested it. I blind taste test. I gathered dish towels to blindfold them while little brother waded through his trash heap of a room to find them (he’s been sleeping in my bedroom because his is such a mess. Seriously. That’s a sign.) I, of course, could not participate because I’m off sugar and skittles are basically little balls of pure sugar dyed different colors.

One at a time I gave each of them a different colored skittle, holding it up so my dad could mark down what they really had, before letting them eat it.

It was a brilliant system. I made up a little chart and everything (pictured at the bottom) that he recorded everything on. They would hold up their color before eating it so that we could compare, etc.

The results were as follows:

Cady: 5/5

Allan:3/5

Little Brother: 0/5

Little brother guessed red twice and was wrong both times.

He is terrible.

Over.