Monday, November 3, 2014

My father and the third world

Okay, so my parents are currently in Nicaragua.
They're on a couple's mission trip through our church and are staying down there for a week. My dad has been freaking out about it because his comfort zone is about the size of the inside of a cheerio.

So I have to housesit all week because even though little brother is 16, dad is freaking out about him being home alone, simply for the sake of freaking out. So I'm commuting. Luckily, they have a lot of food at the house so it's a good incentive. I do a lot of housesitting as it is, so when I asked mom if she was going to pay me my usual rate, she just said, "We pay your tuition. Get over it." Thanks mom.

I went home Friday night to get the lay of the land, you know, any last minute instructions, listen to dad rant about how he's going to contract some disease or that he's never flown over open water before, etc. (I refrained from pointing out that it's not like the plane knows that you're flying over water or land and will choose to crash accordingly.) As all of this was happening I noticed a gallon ziplock bag absolutely stuffed with granola bars sitting on his desk. Four boxes, he told me. When I asked him about it he said, AND I QUOTE, "If necessary, I can sustain 500 calories a day on just granola bars." He seems to think that they won't feed him down there. He told me that he was going to fall face down into a Big Mac when they got back, then he thought for a second and said, "And I don't even LIKE Big Macs." (Apparently we're also having steak next Saturday because it's hard for him to go a whole week without steak.)

(Part of me was a little afraid that they were going to get to Atlanta and he was going to hide in a bathroom until the flight left and then hop one back to Nebraska.) But he did make it onto the plane (he sent me "bye bye" as he boarded) and I was expecting that to be the last of the communication from them for a week. Then, a few hours later, I get a text message from him that says: We are here
I immediately reply: And you have cell service? He shoots back: Yes it is very expensive so you text grandma. Husker score?
Those are where my father's priorities lie.
He ended the conversation with: Goodnight. America is great. Third world not so much.
Yesterday I got one that just said: Greetings from the third world.

I can't even handle it.

Over.

Tuesday, October 28, 2014

Motivation

I have regressed I to treating myself like a toddler, using sleep as the ultimate motivator. I make deals with myself. Like, if I read ten pages of my psych textbook, I earn myself 10 minutes of napping. Bigger assignments equal longer amounts. An online quiz is 20 minutes and a four page paper is worth an hour. (Getting to all of my classes for the day is 20 minutes all by itself.) An hour of piano practice is 30 minutes and resisting the urge to scream out loud during Short Story varies depending on how stupid the class was on any given day.

I think it's a pretty brilliant system.

Over.

Saturday, October 25, 2014

I am like a bored housewife talking about the weather and holiday decorations.

It's been a week... so I have to post. I'm trying to keep to a weekly schedule at the very least. And I know that it's been a week because I'm watching Husker football again.

Would it be lame if I talked about the weather? Too late.
I HATE THIS WEATHER. IT WAS 80 DEGREES YESTERDAY AND NOVEMBER STARTS IN LESS THAN A WEEK. My closet is full of sweaters and leggings and cute hats that I can't wear because I'll drown in my own sweat! Everyone's talking about how beautiful it is and how they never want winter to arrive and all I'm thinking is, 'IF YOU DON'T WANT WINTER THEN MOVE TO FLORIDA'. I want to bake and eat chili and WEAR HATS. I JUST WANT TO WEAR MY CUTE HATS. My roommate and I have had many long discussions about this. Every time it dips below 60 we come bursting out of our rooms yelling, 'Sweater weather!'

Our dorm is currently strung with Christmas lights (because there are no rules against Christmas lights in a college dorm. It's not tacky to keep them up year round. It's whimsical) and a ton of plastic pumpkins and fake leaves. (One of the roommates went a little nuts at Hobby Lobby.) BUT in our storage closet we have SO MUCH CHRISTMAS STUFF THAT I'M SO EXCITED TO PUT UP. We have a fake fireplace made of rather large pieces of construction paper, (it sounds lame but I promise it's not) and we have tissue paper flames with it (TOUCHDOWN HUSKERS) and stockings with all of our names and I WANT TO PUT IT UP SO BAD. I want to get out the Charlie Brown Christmas tree and put it on our little table. I've already started buying Christmas presents. I have two of them in my bottom desk drawer.

I am so boring.

Over.

Saturday, October 18, 2014

Football

So, it's fall break and I'm sort of home for the weekend. I had to stop at Wal-mart on the way in because I owed little brother a pint of Ben & Jerry's because he's extremely stubborn and won't let anything go, and while I was at said Wal-mart I ran into one of my library moms who told me that apparently there are some people out there who are angry with me because I haven't been posting...
To be honest, the main reason behind that is because I'm sort of boring a lot of the time and if I don't find myself interesting then how can I expect you guys to?
But, here we go. I'll attempt to be funny for your sakes.

Anyway, tonight you guys are getting some football.
Just a brief background for you: I come from a household where if there is football on, our TV is on. It doesn't matter who's playing; college, NFL, some obscure Alaskan team that no one's ever heard of - we're watching it. It's how I was raised.
Husker football is less of a hobby and more of a religion in Nebraska
We are crazy.
We're a fiercely dedicated yet temperamental legion of fans. Our severe loyalty and passion makes us rather dangerous because it means the mood of the entire state from September to January depends on what a bunch of college kids do for three hours every week. (We're playing Northwestern right at this very minute and by the way this first quarter is starting it looks like this is going to be a bad week.)
Some questions I have regarding tonight's game: Is Tommy going to attempt a short passing game? Is Kenny going to go out before half yet again because of his mysterious groin injury? Will Westerkamp successfully catch a pass between his legs without looking? Will Cotton be able to remain upright?

I'm considering making a little tab section thingy just for sports musings.... hm...

Well, that's all you get for now.
I'll try really hard to be better at updating. (If only for Dave's sake.)

Over.

Delfies


I don't take selfies. I take delfies. Dog selfies. I took at least 60 pictures with Tank today (and deleted at least 48 of them) but here are a few front runners.

(This is us midway through our run. He's a very bad dog to go running with. I almost died with the leash tangled around my legs.)
(Not very clear but he was leaning back to give me a kiss so I really like this one.)





Monday, August 25, 2014

FIRST DAY

I have completed my first day of sophomore year.

I know I was supposed to post about the fish funeral. And that DID happen. And it WAS AWESOME. But stuff got busy and it's on the roster to post it and yes it will happen. Eventually. That's kind of my life motto. Eventually.

BUT SOPHOMORE YEAR.

I started the day by locking myself out of my dorm.
Yes, I know. How very freshman of me. Get over it.

OH! I HAVE ANOTHER STORY!
The other night we were all down on the first floor in the RA's dorm (by 'we' I mean the whole building) and we were in there like a half hour and after a while we finally started to filter back upstairs and we were talking and hanging out and then suddenly someone asks, "Does anyone spell natural gas?" but we didn't really think much of it until we continued to move upstairs and then one of the guys on the 3rd floor was like, "Hey, come smell this!" and some of us went up to his room AND THEIR HEATER/RADIATOR/THING-IN-THEIR-CLOSET-THAT-DOES-THAT-STUFF WAS TOTALLY LEAKING AND OUR WHOLE BUILDING WAS BEING FILLED WITH GAS. It was super exciting and some of us may or may not have been slowly and inadvertently been getting high for quite some time.
But (mom, this part is for you) everything turned out okay, and maintenance came and fixed it and checked everyone else's radiator things and we're all fine. But it was a very dramatic several hours.

Over. 

Saturday, August 2, 2014

Supplies

I bought a lighter and an eight dollar baby pool yesterday. Yay for end of the summer sales. They save me a lot on funeral costs.

Over.