I am like a bored housewife talking about the weather and holiday decorations.

It's been a week... so I have to post. I'm trying to keep to a weekly schedule at the very least. And I know that it's been a week because I'm watching Husker football again.

Would it be lame if I talked about the weather? Too late.
I HATE THIS WEATHER. IT WAS 80 DEGREES YESTERDAY AND NOVEMBER STARTS IN LESS THAN A WEEK. My closet is full of sweaters and leggings and cute hats that I can't wear because I'll drown in my own sweat! Everyone's talking about how beautiful it is and how they never want winter to arrive and all I'm thinking is, 'IF YOU DON'T WANT WINTER THEN MOVE TO FLORIDA'. I want to bake and eat chili and WEAR HATS. I JUST WANT TO WEAR MY CUTE HATS. My roommate and I have had many long discussions about this. Every time it dips below 60 we come bursting out of our rooms yelling, 'Sweater weather!'

Our dorm is currently strung with Christmas lights (because there are no rules against Christmas lights in a college dorm. It's not tacky to keep them up year round. It's whimsical) and a ton of plastic pumpkins and fake leaves. (One of the roommates went a little nuts at Hobby Lobby.) BUT in our storage closet we have SO MUCH CHRISTMAS STUFF THAT I'M SO EXCITED TO PUT UP. We have a fake fireplace made of rather large pieces of construction paper, (it sounds lame but I promise it's not) and we have tissue paper flames with it (TOUCHDOWN HUSKERS) and stockings with all of our names and I WANT TO PUT IT UP SO BAD. I want to get out the Charlie Brown Christmas tree and put it on our little table. I've already started buying Christmas presents. I have two of them in my bottom desk drawer.

I am so boring.

Over.

Football

So, it's fall break and I'm sort of home for the weekend. I had to stop at Wal-mart on the way in because I owed little brother a pint of Ben & Jerry's because he's extremely stubborn and won't let anything go, and while I was at said Wal-mart I ran into one of my library moms who told me that apparently there are some people out there who are angry with me because I haven't been posting...
To be honest, the main reason behind that is because I'm sort of boring a lot of the time and if I don't find myself interesting then how can I expect you guys to?
But, here we go. I'll attempt to be funny for your sakes.

Anyway, tonight you guys are getting some football.
Just a brief background for you: I come from a household where if there is football on, our TV is on. It doesn't matter who's playing; college, NFL, some obscure Alaskan team that no one's ever heard of - we're watching it. It's how I was raised.
Husker football is less of a hobby and more of a religion in Nebraska
We are crazy.
We're a fiercely dedicated yet temperamental legion of fans. Our severe loyalty and passion makes us rather dangerous because it means the mood of the entire state from September to January depends on what a bunch of college kids do for three hours every week. (We're playing Northwestern right at this very minute and by the way this first quarter is starting it looks like this is going to be a bad week.)
Some questions I have regarding tonight's game: Is Tommy going to attempt a short passing game? Is Kenny going to go out before half yet again because of his mysterious groin injury? Will Westerkamp successfully catch a pass between his legs without looking? Will Cotton be able to remain upright?

I'm considering making a little tab section thingy just for sports musings.... hm...

Well, that's all you get for now.
I'll try really hard to be better at updating. (If only for Dave's sake.)

Over.

Delfies

I don't take selfies. I take delfies. Dog selfies. I took at least 60 pictures with Tank today (and deleted at least 48 of them) but here are a few front runners.

(This is us midway through our run. He's a very bad dog to go running with. I almost died with the leash tangled around my legs.)

(Not very clear but he was leaning back to give me a kiss so I really like this one.)

FIRST DAY

I have completed my first day of sophomore year.

I know I was supposed to post about the fish funeral. And that DID happen. And it WAS AWESOME. But stuff got busy and it's on the roster to post it and yes it will happen. Eventually. That's kind of my life motto. Eventually.

BUT SOPHOMORE YEAR.

I started the day by locking myself out of my dorm.
Yes, I know. How very freshman of me. Get over it.

OH! I HAVE ANOTHER STORY!
The other night we were all down on the first floor in the RA's dorm (by 'we' I mean the whole building) and we were in there like a half hour and after a while we finally started to filter back upstairs and we were talking and hanging out and then suddenly someone asks, "Does anyone spell natural gas?" but we didn't really think much of it until we continued to move upstairs and then one of the guys on the 3rd floor was like, "Hey, come smell this!" and some of us went up to his room AND THEIR HEATER/RADIATOR/THING-IN-THEIR-CLOSET-THAT-DOES-THAT-STUFF WAS TOTALLY LEAKING AND OUR WHOLE BUILDING WAS BEING FILLED WITH GAS. It was super exciting and some of us may or may not have been slowly and inadvertently been getting high for quite some time.
But (mom, this part is for you) everything turned out okay, and maintenance came and fixed it and checked everyone else's radiator things and we're all fine. But it was a very dramatic several hours.

Over. 

Supplies

I bought a lighter and an eight dollar baby pool yesterday. Yay for end of the summer sales. They save me a lot on funeral costs.

Over.

Missing Update

Well.... The funeral is set for Sunday at dusk (probably 10ish because that's when Carol's boyfriend gets off work). I'm currently working on my eulogy. I'll be sure to post it, although my mother wants a video of the whole funeral so maybe you'll end up getting that. Today's mission is to find a kiddie pool. Hypothetical they should either be really cheap right now, or non-existent as Walmart is crushed in the onslaught of school supplies.

More to follow.

Over.

MISSING PART TWO

If you have not read the first installment in the 'MISSING' series, please scroll down and read that first.

Have I got a story for you.

So, the fish. When I left off, it was about 6pm on Wednesday, July 30th (which is still today) and we had no idea where our fish was. Well, we found him.

Carol was getting antsy, freaking out about where her fish could possibly be, asking me if I was in on some kind of practical joke (I wish I was in on it. I wish someone would bring me in on a practical joke involving kidnapping a fish.) Finally, she just started getting desperate, looking through all of the rooms, checking the bathrooms, the toilets, the trashcans. Then she started crawling across the ground, running her hands under all of the furniture, the chairs, the tables, the couch- "AH. I FOUND HIM. I FOUND HIM. I FOUND HIM." She just sort of collapsed on the floor looking so freaking disgusted, staring at the couch and we were both screaming and she scooped him up out from under the couch with a lid and dumped him back in his bowl AND HE STARTED LIKE, SEIZING AND SWIMMING AND WE WERE FREAKING OUT BECAUSE HE SHOULD NOT BE ALIVE HE WAS UNDER THAT COUCH FOR AT LEAST TWO HOURS. And he was all covered in lint and hair (because we don't vacuum very often) and he was SUFFOCATING but we couldn't do anything because he's A FISH and after a little bit we just sort of sat back and let him lay there because he had to be exhausted after somehow JUMPING OUT OF HIS BOWL AND FLOPPING THREE FEET UNDER THE COUCH and we were watching TV, hyperventilating because let's be honest, we are freaking out. After a little while of him lying at the bottom of the bowl we decided to poke him with a pencil and I was only six inches from the bowl and she touched him AND HE LEAPED UP INTO THE AIR AT MY FREAKING FACE AND WE'RE BOTH SCREAMING and falling onto the floor BECAUSE THIS FISH SHOULD BE DEAD. He's living up to his name. Hades. Lord of the dead.

We spent the next hour poking him every few hours to make sure he was alive.

Then... suddenly he wasn't alive.

We called time of death at 8:23pm.

I have since planned a traditional Viking funeral. We plan to send him off on Sunday at dusk.
For those of you who don't know what a traditional Viking funeral involves, we will be putting him in the beautiful boat pictured below, placing him in a water vessel of some kind, and lighting him on fire. (We're leaning towards a kiddie pool. We have limited resources.)

This took me an hour to make and I actually kind of don't want to set it on fire.

Here is his current resting place on our windowsill. (We need to dry him out enough for him to catch flame.)

Details of the service to follow.