I slept through 2 of my 4 classes today.
Curled up in a little ball.
It was wonderful.
Something funny happened today. I'm trying to remember what it was. Hmmmmmm......
Nope. It's gone.
OKAY. I have something else. More like a concern.
So my little brother Sam is a little chick magnet and the girls have been flocking to him since he was in second grade. He's got blonde hair and blue eyes and the kind of face that makes everyone just go, "AWW."
He's a freshman this year and he's been working out and everything and now he's all muscular and I am BEATING THE GIRLS AWAY WITH A STICK.
SERIOUSLY.
IT'S RIDICULOUS.
He also plays the drums, and sings in choir, and plays soccer, and wears argyle sweaters, and is super sweet and sensitive. (He always cried the most when we were younger.)
(One time, when he was 12, he shot a squirrel with a BB gun, but he didn't kill it, just paralyzed it. So it was crawling around with its arms and he was bawling and Dan was telling him to just shoot it again and put it out of its misery but Sam was practically hyperventilating and the squirrel crawled away in some bushes and we never saw it again.)
(He still refuses to shoot anything that's not a human being.)
(PAINTBALL. I MEANT PAINTBALL. HE DOESN'T ACTUALLY SHOOT PEOPLE.)
BUT THE GIRLS....
I AM SCARING AWAY JUNIORS.
THERE ARE JUNIORS GOING AFTER MY FRESHMAN LITTLE BROTHER.
THIS IS NOT OKAY.
DON'T THEY KNOW THAT HE USED TO NOT CHANGE HIS SHORTS FOR LIKE SIX DAYS?
He also didn't shower.
Like, he REFUSED TO SHOWER.
As if he thought that acid was going to pour out rather than water.
And next year, he will be a sophomore, and I will be in college and there will be NO ONE TO PROTECT HIM. HE'S JUST A LITTLE BOY. HE HAS NO IDEA WHAT HE'S GETTING INTO.
This terrifies me.
Anyone know of a good protective detail?
Over.
Curled up in a little ball.
It was wonderful.
Something funny happened today. I'm trying to remember what it was. Hmmmmmm......
Nope. It's gone.
OKAY. I have something else. More like a concern.
So my little brother Sam is a little chick magnet and the girls have been flocking to him since he was in second grade. He's got blonde hair and blue eyes and the kind of face that makes everyone just go, "AWW."
He's a freshman this year and he's been working out and everything and now he's all muscular and I am BEATING THE GIRLS AWAY WITH A STICK.
SERIOUSLY.
IT'S RIDICULOUS.
He also plays the drums, and sings in choir, and plays soccer, and wears argyle sweaters, and is super sweet and sensitive. (He always cried the most when we were younger.)
(One time, when he was 12, he shot a squirrel with a BB gun, but he didn't kill it, just paralyzed it. So it was crawling around with its arms and he was bawling and Dan was telling him to just shoot it again and put it out of its misery but Sam was practically hyperventilating and the squirrel crawled away in some bushes and we never saw it again.)
(He still refuses to shoot anything that's not a human being.)
(PAINTBALL. I MEANT PAINTBALL. HE DOESN'T ACTUALLY SHOOT PEOPLE.)
BUT THE GIRLS....
I AM SCARING AWAY JUNIORS.
THERE ARE JUNIORS GOING AFTER MY FRESHMAN LITTLE BROTHER.
THIS IS NOT OKAY.
DON'T THEY KNOW THAT HE USED TO NOT CHANGE HIS SHORTS FOR LIKE SIX DAYS?
He also didn't shower.
Like, he REFUSED TO SHOWER.
As if he thought that acid was going to pour out rather than water.
And next year, he will be a sophomore, and I will be in college and there will be NO ONE TO PROTECT HIM. HE'S JUST A LITTLE BOY. HE HAS NO IDEA WHAT HE'S GETTING INTO.
This terrifies me.
Anyone know of a good protective detail?
Over.
No comments:
Post a Comment